I'm annoyed.

I added you as a friend is good enough. At least I have the courtesy to share at least some of my life, my circle of friends etc.

But to be criticized about how I pose in pictures, what shoes should I wear, that "oh-not-ladylike" babbling, it's irritating. Amat irritating.

To make things worst, you didn't even have the guts to say it right to my face. You would compliment and whatnot but behind my back?? What is that?! Stop using middle person to say what's really on your mind. Pantang btol guna orang tengah because I don't like myself shooting the messenger. I hate myself after scolding that middle person. And I'd be angrier to you because of it.

You know what, you've been blocked.

Done.

Out of the blue, I listened to Peterpan's CD on my way back from the office yesterday. Omg. How much I love this dude's voice, the huskiness of the voice, it could shake you to the core. Fine, my core. Then the image of him smoking, added to the 'shakingness' of the core. Hmm~

I don't dig smokers. The after smell, the breath..it's just not that cool.

Putting the cigarette at the tips of the lips, either little bit to the right or left.. The concentration, the seriousness on the face, berkerut sket..
With one hand covering the lighter, the other trying to lit the cigarette..
The first inhale and exhale of it..
With the face of satisfaction and relaxation..

And that, ladies and gentlemen, my definition of HOTNESS! But after that stage, it's just a total turn off. Weird is my middle name. Haha..

Whatever it is, Azreel Azhar's voice is just not as awesome as Nazril Irham's. Period.

I've been sober for almost 4 months now.

It was tough for the first few weeks; going through the mind-torturing weeks where tension was our middle name. Usually at the minute I could sense stress, I would go and get it and it was such a relief.

High is the right word for it.

It became an addiction.

But after getting myself a handbag and a pair of shoes that cost me quite a lot, I came to my senses especially when you tend to budget on your meals, but not on the shoes and handbags?!


That was a week after getting myself a handbag. Two handbags and two pairs of shoes, in two weeks. I needed help.

I stayed away from the shoe shops and handbags for awhile; purposely leave my credit card at home, tried to have with the maximum of RM50 in the purse and even just drool over those items that I LOVE so much by flipping the magazines. It was tough, seriously.

The only way to ease my addiction, I persuaded my colleagues to get themselves the shoes or handbags. It felt so good. Bak kata, menjadi suara halus. Heheh..Seeing them doing the shopping, I felt better. The feeling was almost the same as I bought those shoes myself. It kept me sane and my purse safe, but I was never fully satisfied.

4 months and still going strong.

Singapore. Dangerous.

Impromptu decision to watch Remember Me with one of my colleague was a mistake. I was queuing up for tickets when she called and said that she had to bring her aunt somewhere. I just don't give a damn to listen to her excuses, I already had plans to watch this with my good friends on Sunday. But since she has no one to watch the movie with, I did't mind to accompany her to watch it the day before (It's Robert Pattinson y'all!).This is one of the reasons why I don't do weekend with colleagues. Colleagues are just friends in the office; Monday to Friday. Full stop.

I don't mind watching movies alone, I've done it regularly especially when I feel like having some alone time. While enjoying my popcorn, I looked around.

Right: Young Chinese couples, probably 15 years old and probably this is their first date. You know, a little bit awkward and flirty at the same time. It's cute and irritating at the same time. Should they be dating this young?

Left: 4 couples, probably college friends, around 19-20 at age. Maybe this is a normal outing between friends but there's two of them were, well..in the midst of becoming more than friends. While the others were talking about classes, these two were talking about their lives, more of a private conversation. Hmm~

Back row: A couple around 24 years old, probably been dating for a year or two. They must've been really comfortable with each other, when they started to plan where to hangout and should call the girl's girlfriends or the dude's dudes to join them. Reminded me of Qaf and Natt.

As the lights dimmed, sitting there in my favorite F8 spot, I got to think about days gone by; that care-free time when our schedules were wide as open as our hearts, the time before the break-ups, work and marriage began to weigh us all down.

While you can hear the ladies sigh when it was Rob Pattinson's scene, I felt so numb. Fine, the story line was not exciting at all but I was there to drool over Rob but now I just couldn't help but to wonder on all the choices made in the earlier years; not to date during teen years, to enjoy the care-free single lady after graduation, to travel and splurge after years of hard work before some commitment. Now at the age of 27..

Have I missed the boat in finding that one person?

I didn't do anything much throughout the weekend; the meeting for 10th year reunion dinner with the girls, swimming with Atie, watched Alice in Wonderland with the girls, hanging out at Gravy Baby listening to THE voice and..that was it. Oh yeah, I lost my voice for no reason. I spent 2 days with Kuza and bamm! I woke up with my barely-there-voice throughout the weekend. I sounded like Tampin. Sigh.

The meeting was pretty much; as Nadz's mom would put it, 90% rubbish and 10% educational information. Haha..the last 10 minutes of the meeting (somewhere at 12.30am), we got to delegate some of the work and yup, almost there! =) Let's keep the ball rolling!

The whole admin office will be shifting to the new office on Thursday. Clubhouse is 90% ready and our new office will be handover to us tomorrow. I've started packing my stuff since I won't be in the office tomorrow and the day after; due to some meeting which gonna be the whole day. I don't get it. How people would sit in a room to decide on something for the whole day? I mean, can't they do it within at least 2 hours? Don't they know that human's focus only last for 30 minutes? Fine, that would be me and my focus would be for the first 20 minutes.

Last night I slept at 9pm. Perfect 9 hours of sleep with no disturbance. It was so refreshing. I want some more.

Remember Me. The Runaways. What else?

At last, sitting in front of my laptop, sipping some coffee..amat tenang.

So what's been going on with me for the past week?

MMO was tiring. Though I was not involve in the operation side, but planning to ensure that all staff are involve in the event with no hiccups, it was mentally tiring. Plus, the drama bersiri with the PMS-male boss and his biatch, totally drained my energy. I almost cried, every day. Only God knows.

Dad was here at the apartment for the whole week due to the major repairing with the bathrooms etc. I felt bad for being home 8.30pm-9pm for the whole week, tired and didn't really have the energy to have a conversation with him. Just some simple "how was your day" and "whatcha doing?". But I did tapau delicious dinner for him every night. =) Thanks for being my one-week-housemate-yang-amat-understanding Dad.

So what's next after MMO? I thought I could just relax a bit, you know..take a break. But nope, new things lined up til next month. Sigh.

Ok, that's work. Something on the lighter side maybe (I need it so badly pon!!)

I miss my regular visit to the cinema! I MISS YOU TGV!! I MISS YOU GSC! =)